It has been a long time that something hidden fire in my body and it's always trying to drive me to a crazy mode and I always suppress it without any reasonable reason. I'm wondering whether it is my inner self want to push me to further steps and what is the reason I stop it.

Sine there is no reason, and why don't just let it be dominant and go for crazy...

"No great life was ever built on a foundation of excuses. So stop making them."

I think I was afraid of changes, rejection, unfamiliar incidents...

Because of that I started making excuses and always thought that I'm at the higher level of the building to see things differently from others, but I realized that I'm wrong all the way. Making excuses doesn't make you live high...it's just a self-defense and a seemingly beautiful lie on myself.

Too ironically, I always told my friends that to do what you want to do, to be what you want to be. But, it's hardly to happen on myself and I hardly to present my real self in front of others.

"To be what you want to be..." Damn it! Too ironic! I have to do something now!

NEVER EVER LIE TO YOURSELF